The Roach

I have many memories and stories to share about roaches and spiders. You see, I am SO afraid of them. Actually, I'm terrified of spiders and extremely grossed out by roaches. I can't even kill them because that means I have to get kind of close.

Ahhhh, the memories. They begin so long ago and they haven't ended yet: the huge pregnant spider and the babies scattered on the living room floor when we threw a shoe at it and we (me, my sisters, a friend, and my mom) went screaming into the street at 3:00am...the tarantula in the kitchen and all of us kids took cover on the table and counters...the flying roach in mine and Mike's bathroom in college station--I was pregnant--both of us were screaming--the roach was attacking Mike--it wouldn't die.

Here's the thing. Mike is just as afraid of them as I am. Sorry babe. In fact, the first time I heard Mike scream like a girl (sorry again babe) was before we were married when we saw a spider in his jeep. We are trying to teach Zoe not to be afraid of spiders and roaches ("these are our friends, Zoe") so that she can be the one to kill them for us. Right now who ever can get away the fastest is the one who doesn't have to go for the kill. My get away skills are pretty good...but Mike's are good too. About the only time I cry is when I lose this game. Seriously.

Okay, so every once in a while I get a phone call or email from one of my siblings with a funny roach or spider story. Today I got one from Lisa about a roach in her bathroom the other night. It's all too familiar to me so I got her permission to share it with you:

"It was a Texas-sized roach. Crawling around on my shower curtain. Oh, my goodness. I didn't even know what to do. I stood there frozen for about a minute. I thought that if I left it would go somewhere and I would lose it, then be afraid the rest of the night that it would get me. Anyway, I hurried to the laundry room to get some Tilex (that's the closest thing I had to insecticide). I ran back to the bathroom and it was still there. I had a shoe in one hand, Tilex in the other and I counted to 3 about 20 times before I got the nerve to actually spray it. The roach was HUGE! So, I sprayed and it started flying and I started screaming. Then, it hid itself in my basket of towels on the back of the toilet. That was okay, because it took me about 5 minutes to settle down. So, at this point, I put the Tilex down and grabbed the other shoe. So, I have two shoes now. My hands were actually in the shoes for protection. I counted to 3 about 20 more times, then I quickly pushed the basket over. The towels fell out and the roach FLEW out. More screaming. The roach found its way under the sink into a crevice. I was spraying and screaming with more effort than I've given anything in my life. I had no idea if I killed it or not, so I quickly got dressed (10:30pm) and drove to Wal-Mart. I came back with a bag full of roach killer stuff. My bathroom is now bordered with those black roach killer plastic thingies. You know what I'm talking about? Anyway, I don't think he's coming back out. And I also bought spray."